The United Corporations of America – By Kurt Steiner

25 Apr

We all know that since the ground breaking Supreme Court Case “Citizens United”, a long neglected minority has finally gotten the rights that they have long since been denied. Corporations are numbered at a fraction of the human population living in this country. So, this being the case, they need the government’s protection from the cruel huddled masses that, with prejudice and hatred, demand comprehensive health insurance and higher wages that would put them above the poverty line.

I think it was Abraham Lincoln who said it best when he said that we are, “A government of the businesses, for the business.“ Who would protect the rights and lives of corporations, if it weren’t for the government? If the government were to stop protecting corporations, then they would be helpless against the ignorance and hatred of people. It is every corporation’s right to endlessly fund the trivial campaigns of politicians. Lacking the right to vote, how else would corporate conglomerates have their voices heard if they were unable to donate millions of dollars to political candidates? Sure, you could say that corporation are not living things and, therefore, shouldn’t hold more rights than the people of a country. We all know that that is just hateful and ignorant rhetoric. If you’re willing to speak such hate, I bet you say that the well being of a “human person” is more important than corporate profits to your friends. We all know if that were true than you wouldn’t be playing on that iPhone.

Luckily, our government, unlike the common citizen, has seen the error in our views against corporations. One can only hope that the government decides to keep giving corporations more rights than people so at last the scales of power will be balanced in this country.

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2 Responses to “The United Corporations of America – By Kurt Steiner”

  1. Tyvand M. April 25, 2012 at 8:55 pm #

    Kurt brilliantly proves that his opponents may very well be correct. He does this without ever making an argument or at least presenting figures; a wonderful talent! Truly, sarcasm must be the most concrete form a position could ever take.

  2. ksteiner325 April 25, 2012 at 9:46 pm #

    Using sarcasm to state your position against stating a position in sarcasm is an interesting tactic. As for me say corporation don’t deserve more rights than people do, well I think that is just common sense. Corporation are neither good nor evil, but are instinctually self interested. This coupled with the fact that large corporations garner a significant amount of wealth and resources can lead to them do things that may at time infringe on the rights of individuals. Now, if the government gives corporations the same rights as people it diminishes the ability of an individual to protect themselves. Again I am not anti-corporation just don’t think they should be able to influence politicians with their resources. I respect that you may differ in opinion but that will not change my view.
    ~Kurt

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